Congratulations, San Francisco. Now getting royally fucked in the ass around here is a metaphorical concept too!
I should note that there’s probably nobody more liberal than me. Nobody. Affirmative action? My people pick grapes to survive; don’t bitch and moan over losing work to a beaner. Gays? I wish every dude in the world jumped out the closet in a feather boa singing “We Are Family” – more chicks for me. Weed? Sure it has no medicinal purpose, but then again, neither does Viagra and that shit’s probably killed more people than a dimesack of white rhino ever has.
Having said that, you Frisco hippies almost make me reconsider my position on weed. Almost. I’m all for the strict regulation of guns, but not a complete fucking ban on them! This new law is essentially asking people to turn in their guns voluntarily, on their own accord. Let that shit sink in for a minute. Does it sound like genius, or shit-for-brains stupidity? I’m sure a voter approved initiative is just the thing Lil’ Puppet and La Shy Gurl needed to turn over a new leaf. No really, if I’m ever walking down the wrong side of Third Street and I get mugged, dude will probably have to shank me to death because he turned in his 9mm like a good law abiding citizen. Never in your fucking life will you ever hear, “I’d bust a cap in yo ass…but I just turned in my street sweeper yesterday!” Since when do I give a shit if the old granny down the street has a glock? She ain’t running up and down my block screaming “NORTE, PUTO!” If you think these fucks are going to turn in their guns, I’ve got a share of Enron stock I’d like to sell you.
And if none of that convinces you, let this little morsel sink in the next time you’re getting the Rodney King treatment – now only the cops are allowed to have guns. Good fucking luck.