Coffee for the masses.

Looking for the easiest job in the world?

Become a psychic, astrologer, horoscoper, tarot reader, palm reader, clairvoyant, chicken bone healer, or any variation thereof. I can think of no other career that pays for you to deliver absolutely jack shit in return; the only other easy job I can think of that pays well and requires very little effort on your part is a stripper, but even those dumb broads have to dance. All you have to do as a psychic is sit around throwing darts and pulling random shit out of your ass – and you get PAID for it! The other sorry fuck gets NOTHING out of you but a false sense of hope and shitty lottery numbers. The best part is your clients are all idiots because they keep coming back for more!

Imagine, not having to put in any real work and making thousands, if not millions, in return!  Starting tomorrow, I’m turning into this guy:

Walter Mercado

Walter Mercado


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